Since I am a cartoon, I am an art project! Because I live the part, I should be up on what it takes to create an art project. I certainly don’t expect your elementary art projects to be as wondrous as the drawing the represents moi, but I will give you credit for trying.
First, earthling kids should be safe, so use non-toxic materials. Look, I can jump out of a spaceship 20,000 miles away from Earth and reenter the atmosphere with no problem—and no parachute. But you earthlings are surprisingly fragile, so be careful with the materials you choose.
Speaking of materials, art projects for elementary students often use familiar objects from around the house. Here are just some examples:
- Popsicle sticks
- Tongue depressors
- Pie plates
- Yarn, string
From these, you can make some unusual things. For example, with pie plates and paper a child can make a Jelly Fish model that hangs from the ceiling and won’t sting you. (That once happened to my friend and colleague Drusus while he was scuba diving off the coast of Bermuda.) You can go here to see it in action.
Popsicle sticks, tongue depressors and glue are another big hit when doing elementary art projects. Those inclined to build things with blocks will particularly enjoy making popsicle stick buildings. Unlike the temporary worlds built with blocks, once done popsicle stick buildings will last. Just remember to put glue on both sides of the sticks to ensure that your creation doesn’t later fall apart.
You know, there is nothing more fun than finger painting. We may be advanced beings, but it is something we do on the moon all the time. I know it’s hard to believe that creatures that can calculate contorted Einsteinian while brushing their teeth find joy in finger painting, but super geniuses need something to blow off steam with. My pal Zed, normally shy, becomes a wild man when he gets his hand full of non-toxic (remember safety…) paint.
So why finger paint? Finger painting is a great way for children to learn hand eye coordination. In fact all the senses are involved; even taste if you choose to use edible paints. The child’s mode of expression is completely unfiltered because of the abstract nature of the materials. Having your hands full of paint and moving them across the surface can’t help but stimulate creativity and imagination—something you earthlings really need to get better at.
And finger painting isn’t just for children. Even adults engage in it. Finger painting is probably the most direct way an artist can interact with his artwork. The artist Nick Benjamin says he “prefers to paint using fingers as the technique [which] results in a real bond between the artwork and artist and allows for some intricate blending not achievable with brushes”.
So you earthling elementary kids have some real options when it comes to making art. I just hope that Walters doesn’t start doing finger painting because I would look pretty awful as finger molded streaks across some canvas. And we wouldn’t want that, would we?
 OK, if you are not a doctor you’ll probably have to buy some.